Struggling with Chronic Pain in Your Life

          Chronic pain has become a part of my daily life. There were so many things that I could do when I was 40-years old, that are simply impossible. I suffer from Bilateral Neuropathy and some days I could just scream, “God why am I in such pain, why are you allowing me to suffer like this”?  “Nearly 1 in 2 Americans (133 million) live with chronic conditions and illnesses, such as arthritis, multiple sclerosis (MS), diabetes and lupus. Their symptom: like pain, fatigue, muscle aches and weakness, disturbances in vision, cognitive difficulty, intestinal distress and memory loss, aren't always visible to the naked eye.” (John Hopkins University Chronic Pain Unit). So today let's look at the Word of God in an attempt to understand more clearly how God can use chronic pain in our life.
In 1 Corinthians 11:30, Paul speaks of “sin” as speaking the reason that many people suffer from illness’. But there are other reasons besides sin that people suffer from pain and illness. As I look back I believe there was a point that God used chronic pain in my life to slow me down and remind me of my mortality. Others have shared with me that they believed that it was a way God sanctifies us. I remember a pastor preaching that God allows us to suffer sometimes so that His glory can be displayed in healing us. No matter how we answer the question, “Why does God allow us to suffer, He is there with us to comfort us during our times of pain and there are at least four things that take place. First, we become more intimate with God (Job 42:5) Job suffered, lost his family and everything he had and out of his suffering came intimacy with God.Second, chronic pain and suffering prepares us to minister to others when they are suffering. Our having the same or similar illness allows us to move past sympathy to empathy so that we can show genuine compassion for the individual’s pain. (2 Corinthians 1:3-5)”Suffers want to be ministered to by people who have suffered” (Sovereignty, Suffering, and the Work of Missions, Stephen F. Saint). When we have suffered we can provide hope to those who are suffering. An example would be the blacksmith in a western movie, he takes the horseshoe and places it in the fire until it is glowing hot, he then takes his hammer and begins to pound on it until it is shaped to perfection and into the water it goes. God does the same thing to us,  “ I have refined you, though not as silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction." (Isaiah 48:10).
Third, chronic pain and suffering cause growth within us. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1:2-4) During our time of suffering and pain we can be confident and encouraged that Christ understands. I would challenge you if you suffer from chronic pain or maybe you know someone who does, help them, come alongside them and allow God to use you to show love and compassion to the hurting and afflicted.
  

A Template for a Healthy

            A church is not made of brick, mortar, windows and glass. It is a body of believers that come together as the body of Christ to make disciples, and share the Good News of Christ. The church has no other purpose. When our spiritual bodies are suffering due to relationships, stress, jealousy and pride the body of Christ cannot function cooperatively as Christ created it to be. In Acts, we see the early church “continually devoting themselves to the apostles' teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer” (Act 2:42 NIV). The writer of Hebrews speaks of a healthy church as one that “Not forsaking assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near (Hebrews 10:25 NIV). Luke tells us, “Be on guard for yourselves and for all the flock, among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers” Acts 20:28 NIV).  Sign of a healthy church would be, “devotion to one another, coming together for encouragement and fellowship, constantly praying and guarding each other against falling away and strong Spirit-filled leaders.

We must keep in mind, in absence of true leadership, people will listen to anyone who steps to the microphone. This is true in business, politics, society and the church. One of the key components of a healthy church is to have Holy Spirit guided leadership. This not only applies to the staff but flows down to each member.  God has given each of us spiritual gifts and we should lead within the capacity of the God-given gifts. The health of the organization is a result of the individual members maturing and ministering according to their role in the body. It is similar in the family. All members must fulfill their roles to have unity and purpose. For leaders to be effective they must be “Christ-Minded”. “Come close to God, and he will come close to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. (James 4:8 NIV) Unfortunately,  many churches continue to struggle with the question, “What is the goal of the church in today’s society?” Jesus has not only given us the answer but commissioned us to go make disciples. (Matthew 28:19). Some are born leaders but leadership can be taught and learned. “Leadership is not an exclusive club for those who were “born with it” The traits that are the raw material of leadership can be acquired” (John Maxwell, 21 Laws of Leadership). Therefore, for the church to be healthy each member must use their gifts as a family to fulfill the goal of making disciples. The church must take the infants in Christ and bring them to maturity in order that they might duplicate the teachings. Adding members is good multiplying them is our purpose. So I suggest making a shift from programs to purpose.

People engage people, not the color of the carpet or big screens and comfortable seating. “Everything we do programmatically points people to, or engages people with faith building dynamics which translate into obedience a catalyst for personal growth and personal growth results in spiritual maturity.” (Andy Stanley. Deep &Wide, 2012) .A healthy church is reaching out side its walls, preaching the gospel-guided by the Spirit both word and actions and the lost are coming to Christ and are being baptized. “Jesus made it very clear in the Great Commission (Matt. 28:19-20) that in our going, we are to make disciples. One of the most important ways to develop a disciple is to “baptize them in the name of the Father and os the Son and of the Holy Spirit. I would challenge you to evaluate your church based on a biblical  discipleship template Scoring (1 to 5) with these questions:

1.      Is the gospel proclaimed by word and deed?

2.      Are new believers being baptizedNew believers are being taught to surrender and sacrifice for the kingdom?

3.      Are new believers being intentionally and individually nurtured and developed by lay-leaders?

4.      Are new believers investing financial and personal resources in the kingdom of God?

5.      Does the church leadership see their role as equipping and empowering the saints?

6.      Do Small groups focus on building a relationship and intentionally develop both new members to grow in love for each other so that the goal of the disciple ship can be accomplished.

7.      Where Small groups are developing new leaders and starting new groups?

8.      The purpose of the church is discipleship not adding new programs?

A healthy church is a representation of the people of God coming together to accomplish the mission of God for the Glory of God. Painfully evaluate your church. If it scored in the 5-25 range, pray, working with your staff and get your hands dirty doing the work of Christ.

RELATIONSHIPS – WHAT DOES GOD’S WORD TELL US

The Bible has a lot to say about relationships, good and bad. In the pages of God's Word, we can find the secret to having good relationships. And the Bible says it starts with you!  Joseph was the second youngest of twelve brothers born to Jacob, who was called Israel. In Genesis 37:3–4 we read, “Now Israel loved Joseph more than any of his other sons because he had been born to him in his old age, and he made an ornate robe for him. When his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them, they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him.” The same passage also discusses two dreams Joseph had that angered his brothers; the dreams indicated his brothers would someday bow to him. Joseph’s brothers also despised him due to their father’s overt favoritism toward him.

One day, Joseph traveled to check on his brothers while they were watching their sheep. His brothers plotted against him, threw him in an empty well, and later sold him as a slave to some traveling Midianites. Applying animal blood to his “ornate robe,” they returned home and made Jacob believe his son had been killed by wild animals. But one thing that is not mentioned in the Bible is that Joseph never showed any hate toward his brothers. The story ends when their father, Jacob, died, Joseph’s brothers feared that Joseph would take revenge against them for their prior treatment of him. They came to Joseph and begged for his forgiveness, appealing to a request their father had made before he died (Genesis 50:16–17) Joseph wept when he heard their appeal. Revenge was the last thing on his mind. Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” (Genesis 50:19–20).
In the story of Joseph and his brothers, we see the themes of forgiveness, the father-son bond, sibling rivalry, brotherly love, God’s sovereignty, and God’s greater good in times of suffering. Just like Joseph, we are called to forgive those who have offended us and see life’s experiences as part of God’s plan to help us serve others. Thus, I would suggest that we serve others through the relationships that we build with them and our ability to love and forgive.

We were made by God to have relationships this was God’s plan. For God, Himself says, "Can two walk together unless they are agreed?" (Amos 3:3). From Genesis to Revelations the Bible speaks of relationships. There's no way around it, we have to interact with others. It starts with our parents, then our siblings, school classmates, coworkers, spouses, and children. Our lives are made up of relationships, and relationships are what help make our lives enjoyable and meaningful. But broken relationships can make our lives miserable.

 Let’s consider the words of Jesus, Matthew 5:9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.” Proverbs 17:14 “The beginning of strife is like releasing water; therefore stop contention before a quarrel starts” Speaking from experience,  it’s hard to be the one that constantly has to make the effort to be the peacemaker in order to get along with others. Especially when you have been hurt.

The Apostle Paul, ( Philippians 2:3-4 ) tells us do nothing through selfish ambition or conceit, lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself, look out not only for his own interests but also for the interests of others”. ( see Philippians 4:5) In his book, “21 Laws of Leadership, John Maxwell said, “Seek to understand before being understood”. Matthew wrote,"Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets." (7:12) Let’s consider the question, “What about that person who no matter what you do cause strife and brings bitterness into every relationship.  I would suggest that biblically we are called upon to let them know of our love, but we might be only called upon to love them from a distance until God opens the door.

At the end of the day, we must realize that some people for emotional reasons, low self-esteem, or family background thrive on drama to validate themselves. God calls us to love them as well. Their problems should not and cannot become ours. We must pray and wait and allow the Holy Spirit to work. When I say wait, I am referring to that time when God provides a specific opportunity for us to come alongside them and provide the love you have for them in their time of need. I challenge you to go out into your world this week, carry the love of Christ in your heart, and be available to come alongside those who are hurting, even if they have been ones that have hurt you. God bless each of you until we come together again.

Jude:  Contending for the Faith

      I currently am experiencing some health problems and have been challenged with regard to writing to you, Sometimes I feel that my prayers barely reach the ceiling, Have you felt that way before? Or maybe you are there now. I will never forget a quote from “God Is Not Dead 2”, “When the test is the hardest, the teacher is silent.” Those words burned into my heart, as I struggle with pain, anxiety with world events and the attacks being made on our Christian faith. I have come to realize that God is here and He is giving me the opportunity to display my faith to Him. To be a bond-servant completely, in all things at all times. My prayer is that we join hands and serve our Lord “even when the Teacher is out of the room.”

As I prayerfully read the Word, I was lead to Jude a book that I, and maybe you have overlooked. It to be a challenging and a beautifully written book, packed neatly between III John and Revelations.  Jude is the brother of James.  James and Jude are most likely the brothers that are mentioned in Matthew 13:55. I would speculate, the name of Judas was shortened to Jude so as not to be confused with the great betrayer, Judas Iscariot. It is interesting also to note that both these brothers did not have faith in Jesus during His lifetime. (John 7:5). Later they both came to realize that Jesus was the Messiah, later becoming leaders in the first-century Christian church, with each writing in the New Testament.      

 In verses 1-4, Jude describes himself as a bond-servant or slave, we have heard this term before but let’s ponder the true definition. In the Greek, it is “Doulos” meaning to be a lifelong servant by choice to a master, through all things. In these modern times of false teaching, (which we will discuss later) persecution, attacks upon Christianity and sometimes a watered down gospel, we truly must be determined to be bond-servants regardless of the outcome. Jude in his opening verses he writes an  uplifting prayer that his audience would receive their full measure of mercy, peace, and love. His prayer was for fellow believers to develop a strong faith, stay the course and that they might have the mercy, peace, and love that only can come from Christ.

As fellow believers, we are commissioned to take up the Cross of Christ and be the light of the world realizing that the time of Christ return may be nearer than we realize. Franklin Graham said, “ I believe we are living in the last minutes of God’s clock.”  But, we have the promise that despite what any individual, cultural group, religious group or government says or believes;  Our God Is In Control!! Jude describes these false teachers in verses 5-16. Jude as “apostates”, those who heard the word but forsake Christ for things of the flesh, sexual immorality, pride and self-gratification and Jude tells us the penalty for “apostasy”, “blackness and darkness forever”. If we read on Jude clearly describes these false teachers in vs 16. “ as grumblers, faultfinders; following their own evil desires; boasting about themselves and flatter others for their own advantage” (NIV). Their ungodly lust is a threat to the body of Christ; Jesus’ apostles warns us in (Acts20:29-30; 2 Tim. 3:1-8; Pet. 2:1-3). As Christ told His apostles, we must be awake, watch and pray. This is what Jude is saying to us today.

Jude closes by instructing his readers to defend the faith at all cost, (vs 20-23) “Building up”,  has both a collective and a private component; it is done in fellowship with other believers and in the personal discipline of keeping a daily appointment with God” (Dr. David Jeremiah). Jude ends his short letter with a doxology. “To him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy, to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen. (NIV 24-25).

I shall close by prayerfully challenging you to maintain the fellowship with your faith community. If you are un-churched, seek  a church home. If you are without Christ, stop now and truly ask him to come into your heart. We cannot endure what is ahead alone.

           

           

How to Date Your Spouse - Putting the Romance Back into You Marriage

Marriage is a commitment of caring, time, and energy, Face it “Marriage is working hard daily to meet the needs of you spouse and children” But if we look outside the “perfect world”, we find that real life settles in the details of keeping a marriage alive and healthy sometimes go by the wayside.  When that happens the vitality in a marriage can dim. This process is called “Drifting”. During this period there is really no arguments, ,conversations  continue regarding the business of the day, but the evening conversations touching each other’s hands and the flirting in the kitchen have eased. The intimacy has drifted out of the relationship. No, need to think your marriage has hit the rocky shore, it can be revived with the proper attention, Hop

ly, this article will minister to you at your level and provide a few things that you can do to bring intimacy back into your relationship.

Tips to light the flame of intimacy

11)      Commit to a time and day to date your spouse every week. When you make a commitment you are telling your spouse they are important. It also says that you are making you

22)      r relationship a priority. The first step is simply to start dating. But you say, I married my wife so I would not have to date. Your spouse still needs the dating experience for the same reasons they needed it prior to marriage. They want to feel loved and desired  Anything will do for a date but begin making the commitment to a weekly date and making it a priority.  Go to the movies, or out to dinner even if all you can afford is the local fast food restaurant. 

33)      Activity and non-activity dates.  Activity dates are those that involve travel, a movie, the theater, movie in the park event.  These type of date fail to provide real opportunities for conversation. Non-activity date includes a candle lite a quiet dinner or picnic where you can talk and catch up on your individual lives. This allows you an opportunity to reconnect on a deeper level. You can discuss what your dreams and hopes are to each ve these adult moments together. Use these dates to become better parents time alone and how it will benefit them.  Once children understand, they will usually encourage you to go out and talk if you don’t.

44)      Smooth and Hold Hands.  Enjoy your time together.  Kiss and hold hands.  Park in a romantic spot and make out like teenagers.  Put a little sizzle back in the union.  Have fun with it and you will find yourself connecting just like brand new lovers.  These are the little things that tend to go away first as soon as children come and the reality of a busy life sets in.  Just holding hands is such an intimate connection.  And when is the last time you just kissed?

55)       Plan Romantic Get Aways  Your relationship needs a special getaway weekend where the two of you enjoy doing things together.  Remember when you could not wait for the phone to ring, It doesn’t have to be a long vacation, a weekend will do.  It also doesn’t expensive or exotic.  “Find a great bed and breakfast or a hotel room with a Jacuzzi.  If you decide to try a bed and breakfast, be sure to check out the accommodations first.  Some are more geared to families than romantic getaways.  Others are just for couples.  Ask about any special rules.  If you want to have a glass of champagne in your room but they don’t allow any food or beverages it could dampen your time together.” (Families 2012)  So contact them for their policies.

   Look for Part II of "How to Date Your Spouse"  
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